The Roleplay Forum: It's okay to engage in rape play

By Persephone Bolero

Recently, I was sunbathing naked by the pool at Catadore Resort during the Juicy Hunt. A native man came up and attacked me. I was unarmed, and he easily won the fight. I was curious where the roleplay would go, so I pretended to be too stunned to call for help. He dragged me off to his cabin, where he had his way with me.

Afterwards, we chatted out of character in IM. He said he rarely comes to the Amazon because he once had some players in the Amazon threaten to get him banned after he roleplayed raping their friend. They also threatened to attack him whenever they saw him in the Amazon. All this was out of character. I have had others, especially male players, talk of similar experiences.

I know there are people in the Amazon who take moral offense to rape play. If you’re one of them, put a “no rape” limit in your profile and enjoy a rape-free Amazon experience.

That should be the end of it. There are those, however, who not only have limits against roleplaying sexual violence, they also try to stop others from engaging in it. They bring their OOC judgments into the roleplay to discourage such activities. If you’re one of them, my advice to you is to shut the fuck up and mind your own business.

That might seem harsh, but it’s really not if you understand that what you’re doing is called bigotry. I know you don’t see it that way, but it is.

Let me explain...These fantasies are entirely consensual. There is no meaningful way to take consent away in a virtual world. In the Amazon, you can put limits in your profile, and if someone doesn’t respect those, you can politely demand OOC that they do. And if that fails, you can involve an administrator. If all that fails, you can TP out of the sim. Anyone in the Amazon engaging in forced sex fantasies is indeed consenting to it. That means there are no actual victims of rape in Second Life.

If you take offense to what consenting adults do with each other, you’re no different from those people who take offense to homosexuality. No one cares homophobes can’t stand to see two guys kissing. They’re the one with the problem, not the homosexuals. Homophobes should also shut the fuck up and mind their own business.

Some people argue forced sex roleplay encourages men to go out and do the real thing. This argument is the same one used by anyone trying to stop consensual activities between adults on moral grounds. By allowing these types of victimless behaviors, the argument goes, someone else is victimized by proxy. By allowing homosexuals to display their affections in public or get married, kids will become gay or get molested. If someone smokes a joint in the privacy of his home, he’ll go out and rob people to buy more drugs. If a guy wants to jack off to pornography, he’ll become a rapist.

These arguments are nothing more than a way to rationalize moralistic prohibitions on harmless behaviors between adults. I would suggest people who make such arguments put less energy into these rationalizations and more energy into shutting the fuck up.

One player in the Amazon, a good friend who I respect, said she is a counselor in real life who treats sexual assault survivors. This friend argued that there are players in the Amazon who are real world sexual assault survivors, and exposing them to rape play, even if they’re not involved, makes them relive their traumas. So, she argued, we should be sympathetic to their needs.

I don’t mean to be insensitive towards people who have experienced real world sexual assault. Rape in real life is a despicable crime. It does incredible harm to its victims, male and female, and there is no exonerating its perpetrators.

However, if we’re going to forbid forced sex roleplay based on this rationale, we also need to ban torture, as there are traumatized victims of that heinous crime as well. There are also victims of real world violence. Perhaps we should ban all combat, too?

Restricting roleplay options according to the most sensitive reaction it might produce in those who witness it would make it impossible to do much more than dance and greet each other. The Amazon is not a dance club. It’s an adult sexual roleplay sim. Demanding people limit their consensual fantasies because they might upset someone would be like demanding a theater stop showing a horror movie because victims of violence might see it.

The Amazon is a diverse roleplay sim that permits a wide range of roleplay activities. Some of these are dark and disturbing, and some are light and friendly. The only prohibited behaviors are those that disrupt or limit people’s ability to engage in creative roleplay, such as godmodding, metagaming, and being a dick.

No one is required to consent to forced sex fantasies, but by coming to the Amazon, you’re consenting to tolerating those who do. If that’s a problem, you might want to reconsider if the Amazon is a good place for you to spend your time.